What is it about giving up (that is so effective)?

Just a few weeks back a very dear friend of mine gave up. She and her husband have gone through the national housing ordeal in a very personal manner.

As they were set to move into a new home, at the last hour — literally — on the afternoon of their closing — the mortgage fell apart. And they were days away from being forced out of their current home. 

Exhaustion and frustration and rage boiled together in an unholy soup — and she gave up, gave in, gave out. This friend is the one we all look to forge ahead regardless of body blows. She is the one who who can ride through any storm — bare back — and her storm-tossed hair will look all the better.

A business-owner friend also gave up last year. She was more buoyant than I’d seen her in years. She gave it up, the need for a certain outcome right this hot minute — and here she is still in business a year later.

In the past three years I’ve given up repeatedly . . . I haven’t quit, just given up any wisp of thought that I’m in control . . . and repeatedly I’ve been surprised by the pleasant results. First, it’s the most peaceful floating feeling. Second, imminent calamity averts.

I remember when another friend, plagued by work issues, gave up last year . . . and I thought, now there’s a chance for him.

None of these people quit. But they did give up.

So what is it that makes giving up effective? You’ve likely heard the stories too. Actor gives up, lands a dream role. Woman gives up, lands a husband . . . or a job . . . or a raise . . . or some other thing woolly and wonderful. Two brothers give up their t-shirt business but go to one last concert — and now they are known far and wide as the two who came up with the Life Is Good t-shirt idea.

So what is it? What is it about giving up that feels so goo-ood?

You likely have some ideas I’ll miss. Mine are these:

Giving up brings peace to the situation, regardless of outcome. Maybe it is the simple perspective change that allows for a different result.

Giving up brings peace to the soul. Maybe it is the marked change in your energy signature beaming out that ushers in fresh results.

Giving up brings peace. From there all things are possible.

When I heard my dear friend give up on her home search, I felt the peace for her I knew would come. 


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